A glimpse into the exciting job of a nursing home dietitian

My day started by seeing a resident who had gained about 35# in the past few months. I went to talk to her, and see why she thought she'd been gaining weight, expecting to hear "I've been eating more at meals and snacking more, etc" out of this 78 yr old schizophrenic woman. Instead, she tells me she's pregnant and gaining weight because her baby is growing. Hmm. Let's see how I'm going to encourage weight loss now..

Moved on to see a guy who's been having chronic nausea and vomiting over the past few weeks with new weight loss. After some investigating, I find out that he used to be homeless. Why is that pertinent? He's entered a new level of dementia and is now rummaging in other people's trash cans and eating rotten food. Yum. Oh the joys! Maybe if I put cans of Ensure in his garbage can he will find them and gain his weight back?

And finally, to end my day - a lady with a leg amputation tells me "When I get out of here, my first stop is the courthouse to change my name to Ilene. Second stop is to find a new job at IHOP." I didn't know whether to laugh or feel bad, so I did a little of both.